Marc Jacobs is Maybe Single This Week
So, Page Six is reporting that Marc Jacobs and Lorenzo Martone are splitsville. Here we go again. Remember when Jacobs and former hustler/boyfriend Jason Preston (a.k.a. Lil' Presto) were all on-again-off-again for, like, 10 years or some shit? Could this be a similar situation? We're not sure we can take it! It's bad enough having to pretend that we give a shit about Martone, and trying to figure out whether he and Jacobs are fake married or not, but now it's like, are they even together? Plus, it kinda makes all that press Martone did over the past couple of months look pretty fucking stupid.
Also, Marc Jacobs, can you please wrap up this mid-life crisis of yours and start acting like a grown-up? We are so over the inappropriate boyfriends and the relationship drama and pictures of you mostly naked all over the goddamn place. Get it together, please! And Lorenzo, we'll see you out at Fox or Apple Jack or wherever the beardy, lumber jack fags are hanging out these days.
