Get into: CLUMP

Kelly Gorman

Sometimes there is a party that makes up for all the lame shit that all the other bars in New York City do over and over and over again. Sometimes you get stuck at that party, in South Williamsburg, because there is a torrential downpour happening outside. And sometimes, that is A-OK. The party I am gagging over right now is called CLUMP, produced by Colin Self (a total unicorn gay, OMG). Colin had been throwing the party at Beauty Bar in Bushwick, until his latest installment, which took over the fantastic space at Trophy Bar, a queer-friendly dive two blocks from the Marcy stop on the JMZ.

So here's how it went down (from what I remember). I walked into Trophy, said hi to friends, oggled the cutest gay boys that you and I have never seen before in New York fucking City, got a drink, and then watched the performance segment of the party. This included Babes (Simon Leahy of the band T3ETH), giving you all the British charm she could muster, Murphy Maxwell (Clarissa theTeenageWitch), singing a couple songs of his own, and Horchachata (Matty Mendoza), giving full on Selena moh-maunts. After the performances, DJ MNDR took over the decks, spinning some fantastic beats that I didn't know, but mixing it up with some poppier moh-maunts as well, to keep the gays. At around 2 am, when the rain and flash-flooding took hold, DJ Laura Dern (Colin Self) (genius!) took to the decks and hit the grinding and sweating and making-outing crowd with some hip-hop, pop, disco and house.

The Bar itself is a great neighborhood spot but also doubles as a good event venue, with a nice patio, great dance floor, and a stage area. The bart staff is super sweet and attentive, the prices are good, and the decor makes you feel like you've just won something (there are trophys adorning the walls). That coupled with the $5 beer and shot special is enough of a self-esteem boost to get you out of your bar stool and dancing or chatting up that weird gay who is way too cool (or broke) for Metro. Self spared no expense in decorating for the party, with some super sweet $.99 store glowing fake flowers, which became props for the performers and shirtless dancers.

All I gotta say is, GET INTO CLUMP! It is a monthly party, and the next one will be at Trophy Bar as well, which by my calendaring skills, means it should fall on Saturday, Sept. 10th. If last weekend was any indication, the next one will be MUY MUY MAJOR and full of UNICORN GAYS!!

I somehow managed to snap a few pix with my phone during the party. Here's what I've got: