Free Sex: Who Needs Labels?
(photo by Maurizio Fornino)
Free Sex
Who Needs Labels?
By Peter Pony Clement
In New York City there seems to be a growing trend among straight men to be way more open about their sexuality than before. Maybe it's been like this for a while now and I am just noticing it, but I doubt it. Obviously the younger generation has something to do with it, the more open-minded youngsters who have abandoned the older generations’ ideas of what is socially "normal" or "acceptable."
Open the doors even further than they already are. Even though I cringe when I think about it, our post-Queer Eye for the Straight Guy culture (I was never a big fan of the stereotypes on that show) has opened a lot of doors between the gay and straight communities, and blurred the lines between the two preferences.
Straight men ditched the concept that they had to be clueless about a lot of things that women had only cared about up until then. They are more likely to care about their appearance, not shy away from the fact that they like Barbra Streisand, or any other stereotypical behavior that would previously have labeled their sexuality "questionable." They broke down the physical barriers that were formerly in place between them and their male counterparts by offering a kiss or a hug, or both, instead of a firm handshake from an arms distance away. And from this, the "Metrosexual" was born. But what happens next?
Which brings me to this: How far have straight men come in society, from Metrosexual to just plain sexual? And how do women feel about the openness?
I have a handful of male friends who identify as straight, but who have told me that they either have had sex with men, considered having sex with a man, or just dabbled in the fantasy of being with a man during masturbation. Before you jump to the conclusion that they are simply sexually repressed and just haven't come out yet, consider the fact that they are just being open, rather than keeping those experiences to themselves.
This openness is what intrigues me, because it has been fairly acceptable for women to have this kind of free spirited approach. The women who "experimented in college" and make out with women even though they are straight have very little stigma attached to them, comparatively. If anything, they are encouraged to do so by men who find the girl-on-girl fantasy titillating. But what about the guy-on-guy fantasy? Is that appealing in general to women?
I had a friend in high school who was obsessed with me and my boyfriend at the time. She always told me that the two of us together was "so hot" and would get a little antsy around us whenever we would kiss or be physical in any way. She even went so far as to ask me one day if she could watch us having sex. She assured me that she would not involve herself in the action. Instead, she would just sit in the corner and masturbate while we went at it. These days I would be more open to that sort of thing, but at the time I was a bit taken aback and firmly said no to her request. I did not understand that women might like the idea of two men together.
In ancient Greek culture, it was acceptable for straight men to have male partners. Not for marriage, but for sex. It was actually believed that the men would be more sexually potent when it came time to have sex with a woman if they had been injected with another man’s semen. Antiquated and ridiculous as that sounds, they honestly believed it. Who cares, it's hot! It's almost as if cultures go through waves, and our wave is swinging back to the days of sexual freedom, but not in a trendy, contrived, and drug fueled "free love" thinking way they were in the Sixties, but in a more honest "this is who I am and I'm okay with it" kind of way.
"Fag Stags" are a new generation of straight men whose friends are mostly gay, and thrive off the energy that they bring to the table. This is a breed of men, even more open to sexual ambiguity than their Metrosexual predecessors. They no longer just engage the gay stereotypes, they accept the men behind the sexuality, and therefore bring themselves one step closer to blurred lines.
Bisexual you say? Who cares? That’s just another label to put on people, and honestly, who needs them? If Dr. Kinsey was correct, we are all bisexual. It just depends on where our primary sexual preferences fall. That does not mean that there is not a part of us that swings the opposite way, rather we have just not adequately experimented with it. I'm just proud of the men that I have met who are not afraid to embrace what others have for so long repressed.
As we kick off a new decade in a new millennium, lets try to not be such label whores, and allow our sexual adventures to wander toward new territory. Instead of stressing over what your preference is, what's wrong with just liking what you like? If you love pussy, but you crave a bit of cock—and vice versa—does it really matter that much? Let it go. Because being confined to just one sex is so last decade!
Wanna send me hate mail? Love mail? Any kind of mail? Hit me up. I welcome your feedback: ponyboypc@gmail.com
